It's Time

Surprise?

The real reason I've been MIA from the blog is that I've been keeping ^ that a secret.  And it's so hard not to tell.  But it's time now.  I'm 15 weeks.  My belly grows a little bit bigger every day, and I sleep a little less comfortably every night.   Part of me is sightly terrified, but the rest of me is excited beyond belief.  Thinking of myself as a parent of another little human is almost too bizarre for me to wrap my head around.  But I guess it's time for that now too! Now, for a few frequently asked questions: Is it a girl or a boy? We don't know yet! We'll find out at the beginning of April.  Yes, I want to know.  I have to know, or else I'll go crazy.  Do I want a girl or a boy? I really don't care at all.  I think a little boy would be fun and exciting and I think a little girl would be too. Corey, however, will insist every day that it's a boy. I keep telling him, "You know, there is a 5050 chance this little baby is a girl, right? Are you guys getting married? Wouldn't you like to know?  Most common and the most annoying question.     What do your parents think?  I'll admit, at first, everyone was like....um...Really?  And we're like, well, yeah.  But my parents are excited.  They can't wait to have a new grandbaby.  In Corey's family he's the oldest grandchild in his entire family.  So this is the first grandbaby for his parents, and the first great-grandbaby for his grandparents.  Which means it's kind of big deal...so Yeah, I guess you could say everyone is anxious for baby to arrive.   Well, I guess that's all for now! 

Experimental Dinners and Weekly Cafe Rio

Life is...odd.  It's odd and it's fun and it is constantly teaching me that you can do all the planning in the world and still end up in a completely different place than you expected. 
Just comparing this year to last year, my entire life is different.  Different job, different aspirations, different (read best) relationship, different house, different friends.  And I thought I had it all planned out.  I knew exactly what I wanted to do, who I wanted to be with, and who I hoped to become...But I was certainly wrong there...
I think the biggest surprise so far though, is the handsome man that I'm lucky enough to date.  Who will always eat the dinner I cook for him (no matter how experimental/recipeless it was.) Who will tell me I'm pretty even when I've been sick all weekend having hardly even moved from the couch in two days. Who will put up with my hogging the covers and who will work on my car (then promptly scold me for not getting my breaks fixed sooner).  Who almost always lets me pick the show we watch, feeds me Cafe Rio once a week, and only makes fun of my on days that end in Y.   
Corey walked into my life in a really surprising way...she said sarcastically.  We met on the internet.  A truly romantic "meet cute", I know.  But things with Corey were very different.  For our first date we had ice cream at my favorite place and then I bullied him into seeing a movie I wanted to go to.  It was weird because being out with him that night, I felt like I'd known him forever (to be fair, I tortured him for about 3 weeks and didn't even agree to meet him till after that so we'd talked a lot.)  As we chatted we discovered we hardly anything in common.  He likes chocolate ice cream.  I prefer vanilla.  He likes to stay home.  I like to go out. He like to play video games.  I can't even make my little car go straight in Mario Kart.  But I guess it's true what they say, that opposites attract, because I love having the guy around.  He hasn't been my other half for long, but I have sincerely enjoyed the time we've had together so far.  I cannot wait to see all the many adventures life will take us on. 

P.S. I 

Werk Werk Werk

Are you there blog?  It's me, Katie...
I promise, I'll get back into the swing of things, but let me tell ya, life is so crazy right now.  I swear every time I sit down to blog something else gets in the way like cooking dinner or spending quality time with the family, or avoiding cleaning my house.  I'm really well at doing that last one. 
But anyway... I thought I'd talk a bit about the reason I'm so dang busy all the time. 
Work.
Shocking right? As I mentioned in my catch up post, I got a new job when I moved back to Salt Lake.  When I got the job in June, I was mostly doing so because I was getting bored.  I'd only been home for a few weeks and it was absolute torture to sit home all the time just waiting for people to get off work.  My aunt was working for this company and they were going on a big hiring frenzy as their call volume was spiking.  I saw that as an opportunity and started days after my interview. 
The job was easy.  I love talking on the phone, I love customer service, and I like to solve problems.  The system was pretty easy to operate and the people working around me were pretty great as well. 
Week later, I was training new reps.  I was a new rep teaching other new reps how to do the job...like what?  I guess you could say I took to it like a duck to water.  Eventually, I was getting bored of just being a rep.  I sat at home and I worked on developing my own training aids.  For free.  I started taking supervisor calls, and I basically gave my boss no choice but to give me a promotion.  And now this is my life:

I work at home.  I work at work.  I work late.  I work early.  And my phone starts buzzing at about 5:30 am.  Every.  Morning. 

What's interesting about it, is that this experience may have completely changed my desired career path.  I still love kids and teaching, but I've come to realize that I have a talent for management (which is basically what teaching is...)  and I honestly really love it.  

If you had told me a few months ago that I'd be considering a career in business management, I probably would have told you to take a hike, you don't know me at all.  And now it's like I don't even know myself.

It's funny how things change. 

On the Outside

Ever since my adult teeth came in, around third grade, I've been hiding my smile. I've always had extremely sensitive teeth.  I've been ordering drinks without ice since I was a little kid.  I can't chew sugary gum.  I can't chew hot food on the left side of my mouth.  I don't even remember a time when eating and drinking wasn't an inconvenience.   But as a growing young girl, you can imagine how hard it was to not be able smile without feeling self conscious.  And every picture I took looked like this:

So one day, I was sitting at my unit twiddling my thumbs.  I was finished with my work for the day, so I started calling dentists.  I asked for some quotes. I crunched some numbers.  In case you were wondering it is not cheap to completely remodel your mouth.  After several calls, I ultimately went with one that allowed my insurance and had a fair price for veneers.  Oh and availability for an appointment right away.  I don't think I have ever been so excited to schedule a dental appointment. 

At my consultation, they looked at my teeth.  They asked me about my expectations, and they ultimately told me what they thought I needed in their professional opinions.  I sat in the chair and I told them my story.  I explained how I was afraid to go on dates, as I was recently single, and how I didn't want to smile in photos (especially ones I thought I could be displayed).  And how I wanted to be an elementary school teacher who wasn't reminded about her teeth by a different student every day.  Because that is what I saw in my future. 

I left the dentist with an appointment to get my gums lasered.  I took this photo that day in the car before I walked into the office.

Friends, if you can avoid having your gums set on fire with a little laser, please do.  It's a terribly painful procedure.  It was horrible while it was actually happening, but I'm so sensitive I started to feel the pain really quickly.  Afterward it hurt for several weeks.  And it was not cute.  

Luckily, my next appointment was only a few weeks away.  I healed up and they put in my temps.  I got them a just before halloween.

They look pretty good here but they weren't fun.  They were really white, but they were all one piece (no flossing), had a plastery type texture, and they irritated my gums.  They were swollen almost the whole time I had in the temps.  It was worth the wait though.  The veneers they would put in a few weeks later were custom selected to fit my mouth with the shape and size chosen by the dentist and myself from a catalogue.

They put these in a few weeks later and I cried when I saw them.  My face was all puffy and my gums still irritated from the...installation?  Of my permanent veneers, but I was so happy I honestly didn't have words. 

And I have never felt so confident. A lot of people told me "oh, Katie, I never even noticed your teeth before!"  or "You're beautiful with or without your new teeth."  Well that is very sweet of them to say.  But this was not about being beautiful.  It really wasn't even about anyone else. It was about me.  It was about looking in the mirror and being proud of what I see smiling back at me.  It was about leaving my house and feeing confident.  And it was about never again having the thought "I would look so great if it wasn't for my smile".  And how that makes me feel is more important than any compliment or rude comment that has ever been directed at me.  But hey, keep the compliments coming.  These babies are expensive.  

1 Semester, 2 Jobs, and 3 Relationships Later; Alternately Titled: TLDR

I frequently consider a return to blogging.  In fact, I probably think about it at least 2-3 times a day.  But then when I sit down to write, I just don't really feel like it. Today, I thought about it a lot more than usual and I figured the best way to get back into this is to just tear off the bandaid. I figure a relatively easy way to do that would be a brief re-cap of 2015.  And I mean brief.  At the beginning of the year I was living in Las Vegas.  I was in a different relationship, finishing up my school semester and I was, to say the least, uncertain about where I would be a few months down the road. 

Towards the end of February things started to change.  My relationship was on the verge of ending and so was my time in Las Vegas.  I was trying to figure out the best way to stay there, but it just wasn't all that realistic. 
After that relationship ended, I started dating an old boyfriend.  You know...That one that I almost married back when I was 18?  Well shortly after that began I finished up my school semester, and I moved back to Salt Lake.  
For the rest of the spring, and throughout the summer, I continued to date Jake.  We had this whimsical summer filled with fishing, camping, family time, and other random adventures.  I started a new job, I played Army for a little while and then all of a sudden (and I mean it...it was pretty damn sudden) that relationship ended.  That was probably the biggest surprise.  But when I think about it, it's truly for the best.  It still twinges a little to say that, but I'm better off. 
In August, after I started to really excel in my position at my civilian job. I started working off the clock and trying to figure out a way that I could get looked at for promotion.  As I'd only been working there a few months, I wasn't sure how realistic I was being, but all that extra work finally paid off.  I was officially promoted in October and I started training new hires and working on the development of our current employees. 
Also in October, we took an amazing family vacation to California. We spend a couple of days on the beach and several more in Disneyland.  It was fantastic and I kinda want to go back, eat some Disneyland pickles and lay on the beach.

 Hoover Dam on the way to the beach.

 My sister's adorable little family.  My niece LOVED the "big watty"

Seriously...she's the cutest little Minnie Mouse in the universe. 

Disney's 60th Anniversary was pretty Memorable.  I got this cool pin and I totally made the fanny pack look cool.
Toward the end of October I started dating Corey.  I'll tell ya more about Corey here in his one very special blog post.  
and in November I finally made that trip to the dentist I'd been planning forever.  This too will need it's own post.  
But just as a little teaser...

That was on Halloween which I spend with Corey, turning down a trip to see Garth Brooks in concert (for free) to do so. 
Now...here we are at the beginning of another year 1 semester, 2 jobs, and 3 relationships later... and I don't even know where the time went. Things are so different from when this year started.  And honestly, I can't wait to see what happens next. 

Never Forget

When I was 8 I woke up one morning.  As far as I knew, it was just another school day.  I was matting down my crazy bed head, stretching awake and wondering what I was going to eat for breakfast.  My mom was in the bathroom curling her hair, and the news was playing in the background just like it did every morning. On my morning walk to the bathroom I saw the horrifying scene of smoke streaming from the World Trade Center.  Of course, my day went on as usual.  As an eight year old it's hard to understand how something like that in New York City (Basically light years away from me) could affect me at all. I went to school that day and things were strange.  We spent almost the entire day reflecting on our patriotism.  We heard announcements about what had happened and all the adults scrambled trying to figure out how to explain this tragedy to children. 

source

Today, in this age of information, everyone knows a little bit about a lot of things.  It's an incredible thing that is causing a lot of problems.  While love spreads like wildfire and photos showing patriotism and kindness circulate all over the country in minutes the same things happen with hate.  More than half of the things I see on Facebook and Twitter are people arguing about who is more right.  We're divided in everything that matters and everything that doesn't.  I constantly see people spreading words of hate.  Calling each other morons and liars. There's hypocrisy and bigotry.  Prejudice and discrimination.  Constant arguing about police brutality, Planned Parenthood, marriage licenses, amnesty, and who is dumber or more hypocritical.  I think about what happened 14 years ago and how it happened because of hate. Because people refuse to understand each other and continue to be intolerant of each other.
***

I joined the Army because I wanted to be a part of something bigger than myself.  I wanted to put my opinions aside and just do what I felt was right.  I haven't been any where and I haven't done anything, but I stand next to people who have and one day, I may have to.
And for their sake, I just wish everyone could learn to get along. 

Never Forget.

When You Know You Know

Nearly every day I scroll through my Facebook Newsfeed.  I check out what my family is sharing, I might click on a few profiles of people from high school, and I'll laugh at a few memes.  Pretty often I click on blog posts from my favorites, and I shamefully read articles that are telling me what to do and what to think about everything.  
Whenever I see a tag line like "5 signs you've met your husband" or "10 reasons to dump him" I just wonder what makes you so qualified to tell everyone about their own love life?  I'm pretty sure the answer here is this:  They're not qualified at all.
A few days ago, a relationship I thought would be my last ended.  And I think it may have ended forever.  I can't really be sure, but I think it's for real this time.  That relationship checked every box.    i.e.-- his happiness = my happinessI wanted to share everything with him. All I ever wanted was to be around him...and the list goes on and on.
But you know...Real Life is not about checking boxes.  It's about people and their experiences.  It's about different perspectives being combined.  It's about the lives of two people or two families colliding.  Real Life consists of constant changes.  Turbulence.  Decisions.  Differences.  Hopes & Dreams.  Jobs.  Goals.  Money.  Love...
In short...how do you know you met the one?
You don't know.  You might say you know. You might be making yourself rice-a-roni for breakfast and talking to your mom and you're telling her..."mom I'm going to marry him."  But you know, it doesn't matter.  He might check every box.  He could be everything you ever wanted and you might just know.  
But you also might not.